☽ うちはサスケ Uchiha Sasuke ☾ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fantheflame) wrote2013-07-16 08:35 pm
fantheflame) wrote2013-07-16 08:35 pm
Entry tags:
1st fan
[Action: Awakening ((Closed))]
[Sasuke is not enjoying getting used to being unsure of things. But he is - unsure - and finds that while the things he is unsure of are troubling, the state of unsurety isn't as terrifying as it used to be.]
[Right now, there are two very important things he's unsure of: whether he's alive or dead, and, if the second, whether this is heaven or hell.]
[The last thing he remembers? His deranged excuse for a... cousin of sorts? Taking on the ten-tails as its container. And now he's here - wherever here is - standing in a stranger's bedroom, holding a photograph of his brother with (presumably) that stranger. He awoke nearly naked with a pair of wings sprouted from his own back, and now he's somewhere with evidence of one of the dead. What else could have happened?]
We lost, huh...?
[Something like guilt makes a feeble case for life in his chest, but it's hard to feel guilty when you don't remember an ending. Instead he's just... staring at this photograph. One thumb swipes idly across the cool glass, over Itachi's face, half-expecting it to vanish once obstructed. It doesn't.]
[He's not sure whether to feel a sense of final relief - he's here, and, it seems, so is Itachi - or sick doom - who the hell is this complete stranger who's gotten to share in his brother's... something. Not life, maybe, but...]
[The Itachi in the picture is almost smiling, and his eyes look more alive than Sasuke remembers since they were very small.]
[Action: Examination ((Sometime Later; Open))]
[Sasuke is - a little bit of everywhere. He doesn't exactly believe... most of this. Half thinks this is some sadistic side-plot in Obito's (Madara's?) ridiculous Moon's Eye genjutsu (keeps having to remind himself he wouldn't know that exists if that were the case). So he's exploring - barracks, apartments, the shrine, the forest - here one moment, maybe lingering to examine (Sharingan blazing red the entire time) - and then gone in a flicker, off to the next place. He's not taking particular care to remain hidden (really, he doesn't care who sees him in what may be a fake or an illusion or a dream), but he's not being loud about his presence either.]
[Follow-Up Action: Drained ((Closed to Sakura))]
[One thing Sasuke should maybe have done was paid attention to the tidbits he's heard about halved powers, weakened chakra, difficulty... being, as a shinobi.]
[Because now, feeling more physically real than he has the entire time he's been here - how could he be this bone-tired in a dream? - he's slumped on hands and knees on the riverbank just to the north of town, eyes fading back and forth between blazing red and dim grey-black, breath harsh in and out of his lungs. How did he run so quickly out of chakra? How did Sharingan run him so quickly out of chakra?]
[His eyes fade back to dull black and stay there at last, and he lifts a hand to brush sweaty bangs out of his eyes, feeling at once overheated and clammy. Maybe he's had his question answered, finally, and this is hell.]
[Voice: Greeting ((Sometime Later; Open))]
--believe this thing - hm.
[It's a voice some will recognize.]
If paper can really record - whatever. I'm told I've been here before. I don't think I believe that. I certainly don't remember it.
Some of you know me. That's fine. Some of you would rather you didn't, and that's fine too.
I don't know what you know and I don't know what kind of bullshit this jutsu or hell or whatever it is is pulling, and I don't entirely care.
You should know I'm no longer an enemy of Konoha.
Believe me or don't, but I don't intend to fight you.
[There's a shift, and a few long seconds of tape-recorder not-quite-silence, followed by a muffled shuffle of movement over paper before the recording ends.]
[Sasuke is not enjoying getting used to being unsure of things. But he is - unsure - and finds that while the things he is unsure of are troubling, the state of unsurety isn't as terrifying as it used to be.]
[Right now, there are two very important things he's unsure of: whether he's alive or dead, and, if the second, whether this is heaven or hell.]
[The last thing he remembers? His deranged excuse for a... cousin of sorts? Taking on the ten-tails as its container. And now he's here - wherever here is - standing in a stranger's bedroom, holding a photograph of his brother with (presumably) that stranger. He awoke nearly naked with a pair of wings sprouted from his own back, and now he's somewhere with evidence of one of the dead. What else could have happened?]
We lost, huh...?
[Something like guilt makes a feeble case for life in his chest, but it's hard to feel guilty when you don't remember an ending. Instead he's just... staring at this photograph. One thumb swipes idly across the cool glass, over Itachi's face, half-expecting it to vanish once obstructed. It doesn't.]
[He's not sure whether to feel a sense of final relief - he's here, and, it seems, so is Itachi - or sick doom - who the hell is this complete stranger who's gotten to share in his brother's... something. Not life, maybe, but...]
[The Itachi in the picture is almost smiling, and his eyes look more alive than Sasuke remembers since they were very small.]
[Action: Examination ((Sometime Later; Open))]
[Sasuke is - a little bit of everywhere. He doesn't exactly believe... most of this. Half thinks this is some sadistic side-plot in Obito's (Madara's?) ridiculous Moon's Eye genjutsu (keeps having to remind himself he wouldn't know that exists if that were the case). So he's exploring - barracks, apartments, the shrine, the forest - here one moment, maybe lingering to examine (Sharingan blazing red the entire time) - and then gone in a flicker, off to the next place. He's not taking particular care to remain hidden (really, he doesn't care who sees him in what may be a fake or an illusion or a dream), but he's not being loud about his presence either.]
[Follow-Up Action: Drained ((Closed to Sakura))]
[One thing Sasuke should maybe have done was paid attention to the tidbits he's heard about halved powers, weakened chakra, difficulty... being, as a shinobi.]
[Because now, feeling more physically real than he has the entire time he's been here - how could he be this bone-tired in a dream? - he's slumped on hands and knees on the riverbank just to the north of town, eyes fading back and forth between blazing red and dim grey-black, breath harsh in and out of his lungs. How did he run so quickly out of chakra? How did Sharingan run him so quickly out of chakra?]
[His eyes fade back to dull black and stay there at last, and he lifts a hand to brush sweaty bangs out of his eyes, feeling at once overheated and clammy. Maybe he's had his question answered, finally, and this is hell.]
[Voice: Greeting ((Sometime Later; Open))]
--believe this thing - hm.
[It's a voice some will recognize.]
If paper can really record - whatever. I'm told I've been here before. I don't think I believe that. I certainly don't remember it.
Some of you know me. That's fine. Some of you would rather you didn't, and that's fine too.
I don't know what you know and I don't know what kind of bullshit this jutsu or hell or whatever it is is pulling, and I don't entirely care.
You should know I'm no longer an enemy of Konoha.
Believe me or don't, but I don't intend to fight you.
[There's a shift, and a few long seconds of tape-recorder not-quite-silence, followed by a muffled shuffle of movement over paper before the recording ends.]
[action]
It would be a lie to say anything else. He's been happier here than he'd been in a long while in his own world, even if he doesn't deserve to be. (A mindset that lingers even if others say otherwise.) Here, where it was difficult to shove others away. Where he could have hidden himself away but chose not to. Because he'd done things alone before, and that method had failed him.
Sasuke's words, that he knows Itachi cares for him, mean a lot to the elder Uchiha, whether or not his brother is aware of it. Even if growled out in irritation.
There's little else he can say at the moment to reassure the teen. Arriving here typically brings about nothing but mind-breaking realizations, and he knows his brother has already gone through too much of that as it is. So he'll leave this pause for things to process further. Or not, as might be the case.]
[action]
[He feels small and stupid and seven, suddenly, looking up at his brother through a haze of tears as Itachi is patient and calm and Sasuke is standing here barefoot and barely dressed and just short of shaking and Itachi's just waiting for the tantrum to abate.]
[Because that feels about accurate, just now - throwing a tantrum, crying like a child because how dare someone else spend time with his niisan (but really how dare they) and it's a hundred kinds of unfair, isn't it? He knows he's expected to just be okay with it because really it's not at all his business (even if the childish part of him thinks it should be) but he's angry and jealous and fucking hurt all the same because if there was one thing, one thing he ever wanted from his brother it was time.]
[But.]
[Itachi's happy.]
[And maybe he doesn't have the exact words for evidence but he's pretty damn sure Itachi didn't have a lot of chances to be happy back home. That maybe Itachi's been unhappy for even longer than he has, and he can't just... spit on that.]
[He realizes abruptly that everything is hazy and his eyelashes are still wet, so he reaches up again to scrub at his eyes, ever more furious with himself and this place.]
[Itachi is still silent. Sasuke thinks he should say something. Problem is, he's at a complete loss for what.]
[action]
He hasn't done that since they were young, and it was usually Sasuke running to him, not the other way around. He should have at least held his arms open first.
Itachi realizes he's at just as much of a loss on what to say as his brother is. The idea that he's giving Sasuke more time to think is merely an excuse for that.
I'm sorry, Sasuke.]
...Is there anything I can do for you?
[It will be okay.]
I will answer anything you ask.
[action; introspection elsewhere]
The three years point now is nearly upon them both, and they've known each other for pretty much all of it. Law can't read Itachi well some of the time, even with the degree of empathy granted to him by his Haki. But then there are times when he knows exactly what is running through his partner's mind.
He presses his hand against the kitchen wall, leaning his weight against it until his forehead just touches the surface. His other hand curls into a fist that tightens until his nails cut into the surface of his palm. The emotions upstairs weigh down the air and as he listens to the two of them talk about him and their relationship, he already knows Sasuke is Not Pleased about the pirate who loves his brother.
It's the same old song and dance. He's been through it before. There's nothing surprising about it.
The point where his presence in the house will be noted either by Sasuke or mentioned by Itachi is fast approaching. He'll stay out of sight unless called, or it becomes pointless to do so. Until then, he'll wait.]
[action]
[It's a snap, and it's also thinly-veiled and poorly guarded. Sasuke is no kind of fine, not even a little, right now, but he's also sixteen and confused and hurt. The hand he's using to scrub at his eyes is too damp to do much good any longer, and the other is...]
[He turns away from Itachi long enough to put it back on the bedside table, not paying much attention to position or angle, just... getting it out of his hand, so he can wipe up more of those awkward tears, finally enough so he can see more clearly.]
[Truthfully, there's nothing he wants more in this world than for Itachi to hug him. Now especially, but even in general... because yes, it was always Sasuke running to Itachi. And half the time the hugs went incomplete and ended instead with a sore spot between his eyebrows. Absently, still half turned away, he rubs a hand across that spot as well, smearing tears across the skin.]
[Better tears than blood.]
I don't know.
[He adds the words in a soft voice that's almost a rasp, partly just... deflated.]
[A beat.]
Can... I borrow some clothes, I guess?
[Fuck, when was the last time they had a mundane conversation?]
[action]
Mine will be on the left. I don't believe we differ too much in size.
[At least there's something of an assortment to choose from, having been gifted some and convinced to seek out others.
It's true, casual conversation is something the two of them haven't shared for a very long time. That only makes the current one all the more strained.
And Sasuke is clearly far from okay, but there's only so much Itachi can do about that given the circumstances.]
Re: [action]
[Many of the clothes are strange to him - the stranger's and Itachi's alike. And while he stands there with half-blurred eyes, staring into the closet, finally undoing a little of his tunneled focus, a crawling sensation creeps up his chakra. Someone else in the house.]
[Trafalgar Law, he thinks. It must be. Itachi would have mentioned someone else, would have noticed someone else.]
[Sasuke remains silent, pulling out the closest thing he can find to shinobi fatigues. Itachi's a little taller than him, a little broader in the shoulders, so while the pants slide on just a bit loosely, the shirt when Sasuke pulls it on sags a fair bit. Sasuke remembers, suddenly and clearly, being five years old and practically swimming in one of Itachi's black Uchiha shirts. The next breath he takes shudders.]
[He's standing in some strange place, wearing Itachi's clothes, while a stranger who's made Itachi happy waits downstairs.]
[His hand drifts up again, and this time he turns back toward his brother as he skates fingers over that little patch of forehead just above his nose. Makes eye contact with Itachi after those long minutes of not, and as he drops his hand he manages to strain out - because if this place is out of time and space then how is it different from death and how does it matter?:]
I need you to tell me that wasn't really the last time.
[action]
He won't tap the teen's forehead again. Not for this. Instead, he intends to wrap his arms around his brother's shoulders in an act he's denied the other for too long.
Because just saying it right now isn't enough. He owes him more than that.]
Little brother, you are always welcome here.
[action]
[But his Sharingan are still active, and he sees utterly, absolutely, profoundly zero threat in the other's movements. So while his own body tensed, he manages not to recoil, to be still as Itachi -
as Itachi...]
[The moment in which Sasuke is still is much longer than the moment in which he tensed. This one spans a full second or two, maybe more. Then his teeth grit, and his head tilts, burying his face in the warmth of Itachi's chest as his arms lift up to clench fistfuls of fabric at the other's shoulder blades and hold, his own shoulders just barely shaking and his breath silent, but Itachi's shirt is not going to remain dry for long.]
[action]
There's no need for either of them to be anything other than themselves right now, and having his little brother in his arms - wearing his clothes, no less - makes him feel as though something is right with the world again. Some of the damage he'd done could be, maybe even had been, mended.
Saying anything further might ruin the moment, so he remains silent, issuing comfort by his mere presence. He isn't going to push Sasuke away again.
That wasn't the last time. Not here.]
[action]
[He doesn't know how long they remain like this. Just that it's until his tears run out, until his hands have begun to hurt from gripping so tightly into the other's clothing, and that even with spent tears leaving him half exhausted, he doesn't want to move.]
[But that's not practical and life or whatever this is continues to move forward. So eventually he does pull back, just enough to rub his eyes dry again on the forearm of his (Itachi's) shirt. That works better than his bare skin did, thankfully, and his tears have run themselves dry instead of being dammed back. His eyes don't well again. But he also doesn't look up, staring instead at the folds of Itachi's shirt. He swallows, working his throat. When he speaks this time, his words are quiet, unvoiced - if possible, not carrying. The other - Law - has possibly heard everything until now. But the next words are private, and Sasuke guards them close. If he had his way he'd save them until the house was empty of anyone but him and Itachi, but the longer he keeps them in - here, in the first embrace he's had with his brother in ten years - the more his chest hurts, even if speaking them also brings a shameful red up into his face.]
I missed you.
[Not just since a few months ago. No. It didn't matter how much Sasuke hated what Itachi had become (what Sasuke thought he had become (what Itachi wanted Sasuke to think he had become)). It didn't matter how much Sasuke tried to crush it. He's missed his brother for ten years.]
[action]
I know.
He says nothing, but the apology is written all over him.
I'm sorry.]
[action]
[But the hand is gentle and warm and Sasuke's eyes drop shut when Itachi kisses that place that was once a literal sore spot as much as figurative. His breath shakes again in his throat, but the tears don't return. And after a beat, he half-laughs, the sound confused and incredulous and just the edge of hysterical.]
I should punch you in the face.
[But he won't.]
[He's still furious about the past but he can't change it, and he's finally come to terms with that truth. Even if he still resents it. The future though...]
You'd better keep your promise. You don't get to choose for me anymore.
[action]
[He says it out loud this time, his own voice weary.
He's done wrong with Sasuke, but the teen can make his own decisions and it pleases Itachi to know that he's leaning toward the right ones. (And if one of those decisions had been to punch his brother in the face, Itachi would have understood that as well.)
One Sharingan glances slightly to the side, where Sasuke's journal can be found. He reaches over for it in order to press it into the other's hands.]
[action]
[You don't get to make my decisions but I still want your input. How does he even begin to express that? Part of him hates and distrusts every decision Itachi's ever made. Part of him still remembers being five years old and having Itachi teach him skills he's still using today; having Itachi clean his scrapes and tend to his hurts.]
[What Sasuke wants is a brother but he doesn't know how to ask for that, at sixteen and confused and betrayed and tired.]
[He honestly welcomes the distraction of this thing being pressed into his hands, turns it around to look at it front and back before opening it.]
What is this?
[Skirting everything for now. Physically confronting Itachi was his goal for nine years, something from which he has never, ever, shied away. Emotionally confronting him is one point where sometimes Sasuke feels safer being a coward.]
[action]
[He'll wait for his brother to look at it further, glad to give him something else to think about for the moment.]
It can send written text, voice, or images to everyone or just to specific members of the community.
It's... unusual, but most things about this place are.
[He won't go into too much detail for now. Sasuke can explore the book on his own. Right now just showing him how to operate it will be complicated enough.]
[action]
[He'll figure all that out eventually.]
[Just now, though, he finds his eyes drifting toward the door. He'd like nothing more than to just. Sit. And spend time with his brother. It's childish, but Sasuke's too drawn out right now to really function on all the levels of an adult.]
[But there's someone else in the house, and nowhere in this room to sit but the bed, and all Sasuke has is a photographed face and the edge-flicker of a chakra signature, and a creeping, resentful tenseness in his muscles. His voice, again, is low when he speaks.]
Are you gonna introduce me or should I pretend I don't know he can hear us?
[action]
...Would you like to come downstairs?
[He turns before Sasuke can answer, assuming that he'll follow. He'll want to leave the house eventually, after all, even if he decides that meeting with Law isn't something he'll want to deal with right now.
There's nothing else much he can think of to say until they descend the stairs. Their house isn't a highly decorated one - just furnished enough for two simple people with very few material needs.]
[action]
Law's a tall man - nearly 6'4 and built like a mountain climber. Lean, and well muscled - although on the compact end of the spectrum. As the picture shows, he has dusky dark skin, blue-grey eyes, and blue-black hair. What it doesn't is the tattoos. Black tribal markings on his arms and hands, hints of more under his shirt...
The man looks calm. Composed. He's not smiling, but neither is he frowning. It's as neutral as it gets. As dignified as it gets. Especially when you have a handful of naughty cat still attempting to go fishing.]
Hey.
[The living room is about as sparsely decorated as the rest of the house. Aside from the flag above the couch, the only items in the room are those with some sort of practical nature.]
[action]
[The second thing he notices is the squirming handful of cat, but rather than smirk, he takes note that Law knows what he's doing when it comes to handling the animal without hurting it. One minor point of respect.]
[The third thing he notices is the flag, and while he has no particular opinion on it one way or the other, it makes conspicuous the lack of Uchiha crest to be seen anywhere. Something rankles. Sasuke tries to push it down.]
Hey.
[His voice is flat, measured, guarded. He stops about five or six feet away from the other, not quite as neutral as Law is managing, but close.]
You're Trafalgar Law?
[action]
It may be the first time the former recalls meeting the pirate, but it's not said pirate's first time meeting him. Law has some idea of what he's getting into at least in that regard.]